Miss(ed) Manners

November 14, 2007

OW, Damnit

Filed under: Dentists — missedmanners @ 5:58 pm

Good God that hurt.

Apparently at some point during my life I developed an immunity to Novocaine. Either that or I’ve fried enough neurons through recreational chemical indulgence that the stuff just simply does not work as intended. I just got back from a routine filling and despite two giant shots of the stuff, I definitely think I felt every little drill bit.

Ugh. I’m glad that’s over.

There’s just nothing fun about the dentist, not to mention that it’s got to be the world’s least sexy vocation. There’s no dental hygienist porn, and that’s how you rate the sexiness of job. No letter to Penthouse Forum started off, “I’d never believed it would have happened to me, but as I lay there incapacitated with two mini vice grips sticking out of my mouth, I felt a hand wander up my leg.”

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the fact that the noble art of Dentistry has kept all of my chompers in my head. It’s hard to be suave when you’re lisping past summer teeth and gums.  It’s just that there’s such a negative stigma associated with the profession, who would strive for that.

I mean, you could go to the Doctor and be told you’ve got a week to live, or get a camera up your butt, or your mom could be targeted by a rogue plastic surgeon if you’re a rap artist.  And yet there are scores of television shows devoted to doctors.

Generally the worst that could happen when you go to the Dentist is that you’re subjected to mild, annoying pain that may linger for a few days. Where is the Dirk Mantooth, DDS program on CBS?

It would beat the shit out of CSI:Miami.

Blog at WordPress.com.