Miss(ed) Manners

May 2, 2007

The Worst

Filed under: Humor — missedmanners @ 4:40 pm

The Worst is when you’ve been working your ass off on something and then you screw up one tiny detail and all of a sudden you feel like the biggest moron on the planet. *doh* THEN you realize you messed up something else just as tiny and you’re kicking yourself for the next five or six days. That would sum up my day today, silly little mistakes.

Cannot WAIT for this week and weekend to be over with.

On a bright and happy note, I’ve got a great group of people I think you should direct your collective ire towards:

People Who Lock Their Doors When They’re Home.

I hope you fall, cannot get up and then asphyxiate because the paramedics couldn’t knock down your door. The world is a billion times safer than you’re afraid it is. What makes me even crazier is when they lock them in safe neighborhoods, like the goddamn suburbs or something. What’s the point of moving to the suburbs and living with suburb people if you’re not going to be safe with unlocked doors? Why inflict that mind-numbing homogeny on yourself if you can’t even invite someone over for a beer and just have them walk in all sitcom style?

Single ladies, you may be excused from this particular rant, obviously there are some extenuating circumstances. However, I know that if I were a little lady named Davette, I’d keep several deadly weapons around, mace, taser, katana, etc.

I guess what I’m getting at is, how afraid is too afraid? Sure you probably want to maintain a steady level of suspicious awareness at all times, I mean, the world can fling some crazy shit at you. But why deadbolt your door, put the chain on and then look out the peephole when you know I’m coming over to play some frikkin video games, Steve? You live on the Upper East side, and no, the 90’s are not even close to Harlem.

Jeeez.

10 Comments »

  1. Oh, poor Steve!!

    Ha!

    Comment by Naughty Heather — May 2, 2007 @ 7:01 pm | Reply

  2. “Single ladies, you may be excused from this particular rant”

    Oh, whew. I was going to say….

    Comment by max — May 2, 2007 @ 10:50 pm | Reply

  3. OMG! This was great! I’ve had this same discussion with people. Lil lady locks the bathroom door and it irks the piss outta me cause i’m always telling her not to just in case of an emergency. i live in one of those neighborhoods you described and you’d be hard pressed to find me locking doors. Hell, i once went to town (like 10 mins away) to WalMart and forgot to lock the door. Nothing was missing upon my return.

    I completely agree that people have taken “homeland security” to places it really didn’t need to go. *sigh*

    Comment by BluJewel — May 3, 2007 @ 8:43 am | Reply

  4. Hehehe, Blu, you’d be surprised just how little interest most criminals have in your worldly possessions. Your car is a MUCH easier target.😀

    Comment by missedmanners — May 3, 2007 @ 10:46 am | Reply

  5. I am not all that worried about my worldly possessions. It is the building facility people with master keys who habitually walk through my door uninvited while I am in bed not dressed that encouraged me to put an extra lock on the door.

    Comment by max — May 3, 2007 @ 12:56 pm | Reply

  6. Ha! Well, like I said, obviously there are extenuating circumstances.

    I’d definitely get a katana though if I were you. Everyone fears the katana.

    Comment by missedmanners — May 3, 2007 @ 1:01 pm | Reply

  7. I am not allowed to play with sharp objects before I am fully awake. I am more likely to cut down the bed nettings and remove my own ear, in states of partial “awake” than scare the building guys.

    Comment by max — May 3, 2007 @ 1:05 pm | Reply

  8. Oooh. Good point.

    Hmmmm.

    Let’s see, non-dangerous protective weaponry… about a nerf sword?

    Comment by missedmanners — May 3, 2007 @ 1:15 pm | Reply

  9. Oh yeah, that’ll work.

    Me: Zzzzz.
    Facilities Guy 1: I’m bored.
    Facilities Guy 2: Me too.
    Facilities Guy 1: Let’s go walk in on naked girl and watch her thrash around with the nerf sword again she is never up before 10.
    Facilities Guy 2: Cool. Grab the master keys.

    Comment by max — May 3, 2007 @ 2:17 pm | Reply

  10. […] [originally inspired by a post on missed manners] […]

    Pingback by why max has extra locks on the door « celluloid blonde — May 22, 2007 @ 1:32 pm | Reply


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