Miss(ed) Manners

March 14, 2007

I Got the Worm

Filed under: Humor — missedmanners @ 9:19 am

Not a tapeworm, although that would be awesome. Imagine actually being hungry all the time (I’ll talk about this tomorrow), and being able to eat all you want and not get fat. As long as you get past the fact that you’ve got a twenty foot parasite living inside of you it would rule, especially considering the fact that I have to deal with five to six foot tall parasites all the damn time.

Not a tequila worm either, though thanks for the assumption about my philandering alcoholic ways.

Nope, I got the early worm today. Lately I’ve been living off my phone. It’s one of those awesome Pocket PC type deals and I’ve got a slew of alarms, notifications, dates, numbers, addresses and pictures on it. Remember the tri-corder from Star Trek? No? Good, you’re not a virgin. In any case, my phone makes the tri-corder look like a broken anal thermometer if only for the simple fact that I can watch PORN on it. Yes. Porn.

But it’s a little complicated. Today I woke up a full hour early because of an alarm I’d set two weeks ago. I had slept through it last Wednesday because I’d been drunker than Paula Abdul at a free oxycontin giveaway party in the Valley. This morning I just thought I was unreasonably tired. I shook off the sleepiness, got showered and headed to work.

Compound with this the fact that Saturday was the beginning of Daylight Savings Time and I was actually up two hours early. My super survival senses finally told me this as I waited for the train and watched the sun come up.

That’s it really. Not much else to tell. I’ve gotten an hour head start on the day. Breakfast: Eaten. Email: Checked and sorted. Post breakfast cigarette: smoked.

Basically I’ve got an extra hour today to do with as I please. I’d appreciate some suggestions.



  1. read a book. that’s what I usually do when I have some time to kill.

    Comment by fuzzy — March 14, 2007 @ 1:46 pm | Reply

  2. 😆 Thanks for the idea. I generally do that anyway. This is a magical hour though, needs to be special.

    Comment by missedmanners — March 14, 2007 @ 2:05 pm | Reply

  3. hmm how bout put the music on loud and dance the kind of dances you’d kill anyone who walks in and sees you do. lol

    Comment by dragonsvamp — March 14, 2007 @ 4:05 pm | Reply

  4. See that’s good. I may do that tonight. For a whole hour. 😀

    Comment by missedmanners — March 14, 2007 @ 4:08 pm | Reply

  5. Mix us up a super sweet bangin jungle track using sound bites recorded on your gadget phone and post it up here tomorrow! Hang on that’s more like work than fun. Get down and give me ten!

    Comment by Reuben — March 15, 2007 @ 9:53 am | Reply

  6. Masterbate.

    That’s what everyone else does. XD

    Comment by EmilyTheStrange — March 18, 2007 @ 5:48 am | Reply

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