Miss(ed) Manners

January 24, 2007

The CSI: Miami Drinking Game

Filed under: CSI,Drinking,Drinking Games,Silly — missedmanners @ 1:38 pm

Okay, so on Monday I mentioned my roommate’s and my abusive love for the show, CSI:Miami. The show is amazing. It takes every unbelievable, laughable aspect of the original CSI and puts it in a thong bikini. The show’s become so ridiculously predictable that we jokingly made up a drinking game based on the things you WILL see every episode.

The first of these refer to the main character, Lieutenant Horatio Caine, played by David Caruso.

Check him out:

23m.jpg

This image is misleading because that motherfucker is always wearing sunglasses, because, in case you forgot, it’s fucking crazy bright in Miami. Here are some of the rules pertaining to him:

If at any time someone actually says David Caruso’s character’s full, ridiculous name (Horatio Caine): 1 Drink

David Caruso removes his sun glasses to emphasize a point: 1 Drink

NEW! David Caruso puts ON his sun glasses to emphasize a point: 1 Drink

The emphasized point is the lead in quote to the theme song: Drink half of your drink

Says another characters name as though it were a question (Alexx……?): 1 Drink

Caine utters some Confucian wisdom, for example, “Tomorrow is what you make of it,” or “Sometimes when you have everything it feels like nothing at all.”: 1 Drink… 5 if you don’t crack up laughing.

If Caine sticks up for an abused woman by physically threatening the man doing the beating thereby showing that violence is not the answer: 3 Drinks

Anytime Caine intentionally keeps his staff in the dark regarding key knowledge of a case to keep their objectivity intact: 1 Drink for every character fooled, 5 Drinks for every character that figures it out, 1 Whole Beer if it was something incredibly contrived like a Norwegian mouse hair or some bullshit like that.

You see a shot of Caine in his pimped out hummer: 1 Drink

You see a shot of Caine jumping out of his hummer, gun in hand: +3 Drinks

Now some minor characters:

th-emilyproct_ausse_7938280_400.jpg

Emily Procter a.k.a “Calleigh Duquesne”

Calleigh is a southern girl, and don’t you forget it. She’s also an incredibly gifted CSI, you can tell this because she’s wicked hot. Her rules:

Anytime Calleigh brutally overpowers a much larger man because she knows CSI Brand Jui Jitsu: 2 Drinks

If the beating was administered because the villain made light of the fact that Calleigh has a vagina: +1 Drink

th-55449_1_6.jpg

Adam Rodridguez a.k.a “Eric Delko”

Eric is hot under the collar and came from a rough background, he may or may not like smoking the weed.

Anytime Eric gets hot under the collar: 1 Drink

Anytime you are reminded that Eric is from a rough background: 1 Drink

If he actually smokes weed: Sit back and watch CBS implode under the weight of a nation’s misplaced disdain.

68m.jpg

Khandi Alexander a.k.a. “Dr. Alexx Woods”

Alexx is the resident mortician/autopsy lady. She’s got this whole queen of the dead type thing going on that routinely makes my naughty bits tingle. Her rules:

If she says the word(s):

“Mortis”: 1 Drink

“Rigor”: 1 Drink

“Time of Death”: 1 Drink

“Shoe leather”: 2 Drinks

“Door nail”: 3 Drinks

“Disco”: 4 Drinks

“David Caruso’s Film Career”: 8 Drinks, reenact the pussy eating scene from Jade with a throw pillow.

If at any time Dr. Alexx speaks to a corpse and expresses regret over his/her death showing that despite handling thousands of corpses daily, she is in no way jaded: 2 Drinks

Rules for Scenes Inside the CSI Mega Lab Complex

Most of the show takes place in here when H isn’t out tracking down bikini bandits or something. If you’ve ever been in a real forensics lab checking semen samples (like ya do), then you know that they’re actually fluorescent lit, horribly uncomfortable places. Not the CSI: Miami lab, hell no. Their headquarters was designed by robot versions of the guys from Queer Eye. Here’s a list of rules for their absolutely idiotic take on forensic research.

Any time you see a custom user interface for a computer program the techs are running: 1 Drink

Any time you see a futuristic font used in said interface: +1 Drink

If that user interface is projected gratuitously on a wall behind the characters: 2 Drinks

If a character uses a computer to magically enhance a blurry image far beyond what is possible: 4 Drinks

Example: cannot equal this: This

Computer generated zoom in to watch a wound unfold on a person in a manner that is in no way gross, nope, not at all: 1 Drink

Same computer generated zoom in done in slightly different manner to reflect new evidence in a way that’s not cliche, nope, not at all: +1 Drink

Black light used as background light, not for semen search: 2 Drinks

Semen search black light: 1 Drink (the point is to get drunk)

Different colored light used for some kind of alien semen search or something: 2 Drinks

Final Rule:

If the body count of the entire show ends up being 1 or less: Drink entire beer, change channel, you may have been watching the Golden Girls. Not your fault, it’s easy to mix up Caruso and Rue McClanahan.

73 Comments »

  1. 😀 I don’t drink, but I’m going to print the list and keep track of exactly how much I would have imbibed during the next episode if I was following your rules.

    Comment by tiffanytaylor — January 24, 2007 @ 2:00 pm | Reply

  2. Good game! Should come with a warning though – Playing this game for the entire duration of a CSI:Miami episode leads to alcohol poisoning, unless you die laughing first:-)

    Comment by suburbanlife — January 24, 2007 @ 2:16 pm | Reply

  3. How about a drink every time you lose track of what Emily Procter’s character is saying because her dialogue has been recorded so poorly? I find myself continuously turning up the volume every time she opens her mouth only to be blasted out of my chair when they cut to commercial.

    Comment by TheIdesOfMark — January 24, 2007 @ 10:23 pm | Reply

  4. I’ve never watched CSI: Miami, but I’m gonna! Very funny blog, BTW.

    Comment by phiz — January 25, 2007 @ 5:03 am | Reply

  5. Its the only tv prog i watch these days – you have shattered all my illusions I thought I was the only one! – I’m still laughing can’t wait to see the prog soon – even funnier now!

    Cheers

    Comment by adders45 — January 25, 2007 @ 12:35 pm | Reply

  6. You forgot one rule: Every time Horatio takes off his sunglasses, gazes into the distance, looks down, looks up and then puts them on again without saying a word: (at least) 5 drinks – you’ll need it to get to the end of the show

    Comment by Maria — January 25, 2007 @ 5:13 pm | Reply

  7. Hilarious post! The Beast never watched any of the CSI :Whatevers (do they have one for Trenton yet?) but it sounds like you and your roomies are in for a one-way trip to Blackout Island whenever you do.

    Comment by hairybeast — January 27, 2007 @ 5:32 am | Reply

  8. Shit man, if you took a drink every time Horatio stood looking sideways like his handsome self was in a mirror or some goddamned thing, you’d be TOASTED half way through the show!

    Comment by Mr. Natural — January 28, 2007 @ 10:18 pm | Reply

  9. That’s hilarious, I think either that or a modified version of it is going to by played in a house surrounding me soon, the only additions I’d make, are H putting his hand in his hip (moving jacket aside to manage it, usually in conjunction with sunglasses but not always) and putting his foot up on a chair/stool/raised surface and leaning on his knee to make a point.

    Comment by Adam — January 30, 2007 @ 10:34 am | Reply

  10. Absolutely!

    These are all great comments. The game is definitely a work in progress as we’re constantly adding new rules. I’ll update the new rules in a few days and add any suggestions you guys make.

    Comment by missedmanners — January 30, 2007 @ 2:09 pm | Reply

  11. Thanks! This is so fllippin’ funny … I shall give it a try!

    Comment by marianne — February 6, 2007 @ 6:06 pm | Reply

  12. […] This clip has been bouncing around on Youtube for a while now, but watching it really helps explain some of the Horatio rules from my original post on the topic: The CSI: Miami Drinking Game […]

    Pingback by CSI: Miami Drinking Game Update « Miss(ed) Manners — February 16, 2007 @ 12:54 pm | Reply

  13. […] proud to present a drinking game for those of you who are obsessed with CSI: Miami. Failing that it works quite well with those who […]

    Pingback by jacksonj04 » Blog Archive » The CSI: Miami Drinking Game — February 18, 2007 @ 5:00 pm | Reply

  14. […] the almost exact delivery of the lines each time, but keep watching, or check out the rules for the CSI: Miami Drinking Game and the update for a few […]

    Pingback by Monkeywiz » Blog Archive » CSI: Miami, Horatio Hilarity — February 23, 2007 @ 11:50 am | Reply

  15. Here are some rules my wife and I have been using. Most of these apply to all three CSIs, but some are specific to the Miami one:

    1. Every time someone refers to “the vic”, take a drink. Drink the entire bottle if the “vic” is actually named Vic.

    2. Every time Horatio turns sideways and strikes a pose while talking to a suspect – 1 drink.

    3. The first time a female CSI shows cleavage – 1 drink. Only valid for the first time in a scene, not everytime the camera cuts to her.

    4. Whenever a female CSI shows up at a crime scene in appropriate attire (high heels, low cut dress, jewelry, etc.) – 1 drink. Take 2 drinks if she shows up in a cocktail dress or some other formal attire.

    5. Whenever someone uses an acronym other than DNA (e.g. TOD, COD) – 1 drink.

    6. 1 drink whenever the Gary Sinise character on CSI:NY makes a reference to 9/11.

    7. Jump To Conclusion: anytime a CSI jumps to a conclusion not supported by the evidence. For instance, “he has dog hair on him, so we’re looking for a veternarian”, or “he ate fish for lunch, so we must be looking for a fisherman”.
    1 drink.

    8. Caught in a Lie: anytime a suspect gets caught in a lie: “I haven’t seen the guy for three weeks”, “we have your DNA at the scene”, “okay, I was there, but I didn’t kill him!”. 2 drinks if he gets caught in more than one lie at the interview session.

    9. Empty Threat: every time Horatio issues an empty threat to a suspect who later turns out to be innocent: “I’m going to prove you did it”. 1 drink.

    10. 2 drinks whenever Horatio “bonds” with a child who in real life would find him incredibly creepy.

    11. The Zinger: Every time someone says a zinger. 1 drink if it’s right before the commercial, and 2 drinks if it’s right before the opening theme song. This one is hard and will require that you pause the Tivo to discuss whether or not what was said really qualifies as a zinger. Usually there’s a pun involved, or some sort of ironic statement.

    Comment by Spiny Norman — February 27, 2007 @ 5:58 pm | Reply

  16. Oops. Rule #4 should be INappropriate attire.

    Comment by Spiny Norman — February 27, 2007 @ 6:04 pm | Reply

  17. Spiny.
    Those are AWESOME.

    Thanks so much!🙂 I’m going to do a full compilation in a week or two, as the suggestions keep coming in.

    Comment by missedmanners — February 27, 2007 @ 6:14 pm | Reply

  18. hi horatio caine y do u like to wear those sunglases do u miss your wife on csi miami did ERIC DELKO DIE ON CSI MIAMI WELL HORATIO CAINE GTG BYE FROM MENIKA FREDERICK

    Comment by hill harper — April 1, 2007 @ 12:59 pm | Reply

  19. HI H ITS ME AGAIN THEY CALL U H ON THE SHOW SO DID ERIC DIE ON THE THE SHOW TELL ME IAM YOUR FAN IAM YOUR NUNBER ONE FAN I HAVE ONLY BEEN WATCHING THE SHOW FOR TWO YEARS I WILL CRY IF CSI MIAMI GOES OF THE AIR CRY CRY CRY BYE BYE IAM 12 YEARS OLD BYE HORATIO CAINE

    Comment by hill harper — April 1, 2007 @ 1:06 pm | Reply

  20. hi this csi games wont let me play 1 game but i love csi

    Comment by catherine — June 3, 2007 @ 8:35 pm | Reply

  21. There is nothing about Ryan Wolfe, how about when him and Calleigh wear the same shirt. It happens alot.

    Comment by jt — June 21, 2007 @ 2:26 am | Reply

  22. Great site!! Need to add a 5 drinker for when Horatio does the double-handed-sunglasses-on-hands-on-hips-look-to-the-sky move

    Comment by tigger-or-e'or — July 9, 2007 @ 11:27 pm | Reply

  23. this is quite sad but got some additions to ur drinking game! me and my bf noticed that every episode way more than once, horatio tilts his head when hes saying something important then random shoots off the screen, we even counted once and i swear he did it about 20 times!

    Comment by kelly — August 22, 2007 @ 4:42 pm | Reply

  24. Anytime Horacio says something to the effect of, “Here is what I want you to do” or “I need you to do this”.

    1/2 beer.

    This occurs at up to 3 times per episode.

    Comment by Sweetpea — September 17, 2007 @ 11:18 pm | Reply

  25. they’ll have you suicidal suicida. Serafino Raimondo.

    Comment by Serafino Raimondo — September 19, 2007 @ 2:24 pm | Reply

  26. Wow, this blog made me laugh pretty dammed hard. I know all those shows are ridiculous but I watch them all the time nonetheless… I’ll definitely be trying this game soon.

    Just thought I’d add one more:
    Everytime Horatio punctuates a sentence with a William-Shatner-style dramatic pause, 1 drink. Of course, only for the highly alcohol tolerant player, since he does it every other sentence or so…

    Comment by LameCSIjunkie — October 6, 2007 @ 4:09 pm | Reply

  27. dude i try this game and end up wasted with my girl we are trying to play every episode by the time they done we are going to need a application on AA so peace and don’t drink and drive

    THE CUBAN

    Comment by the cuban — October 18, 2007 @ 7:56 pm | Reply

  28. you had me suicidal, suicida. Huda Swithun.

    Comment by Huda Swithun — October 21, 2007 @ 4:15 pm | Reply

  29. If your a non-drinker or wish to quit, just reverse the rules: Drink all through the show, EXCEPT when they do the above rules… you’ll be totally sober at the end, but then you’ll want to drink again because you just realized that you watched the show.

    Comment by Ron — October 31, 2007 @ 5:25 pm | Reply

  30. Very funny.

    I especially get a kick out of that they seem to have a high-tech gadget or software program for anything you can think of….I’m sure the FBI doesn’t even have most of that stuff.

    Here’s one that is equally nauseating, and standard procedure as the ones mentioned….Horatio loves to bend that neck. In EVERY episode, at least once, H.C. will do the neck bend, and say “Eric,….”

    Comment by Rick — November 13, 2007 @ 12:18 am | Reply

  31. This is GREAT. I will be printing this up and framing it, and hosting CSI: Miami drinking night every weekend from now on.

    Comment by Adam — November 24, 2007 @ 10:04 pm | Reply

  32. One addition: +3 drinks for every time H does something not in the job description, like driving a car thats about to explode into the ocean, or going into a building with guns blazing.

    Comment by Justin — December 4, 2007 @ 11:42 pm | Reply

  33. How about every time they use a stupid cliche abbreviation which has more syllables than if they had just said the phrase: 5 drinks.

    eg. GSW = Gun Shot Wound

    GSW: 5 syllables
    Gun Shot Wound: 3 syllables

    Comment by Marc — December 11, 2007 @ 7:46 pm | Reply

  34. to whom it may concern, i am writing to you guys as i have a request for you. i was wondering if you could put more of csi on tv as i watch evry single episode of csi,csi miami and csi new york. and my other request i am going to ask is if you can put some csi games on the net so i dont have to buy the computer game. thankyou very much and if you have any concerns about my requests please contact me on liz-rox-16@hotmail.com. thankyou.

    p.s: please do not post this on the net so everyone can see. thankyou.

    Comment by lizzie — December 16, 2007 @ 12:28 am | Reply

  35. i love csi. i am always watching it.i am there biggest fan.if i could i would buy evry single thing to do with csi.

    Comment by lizzie — December 16, 2007 @ 12:31 am | Reply

  36. how about everytime H says something and then dramatically repeats himself..

    Comment by klakky — December 20, 2007 @ 8:13 pm | Reply

  37. Have you considerd the same such game for “Moonlight” the latest vampire/PI dumbass show. OMG you would be shitfaced before the 1st commercial break. Thank got for those breaks in the show or I would pee myself laughing so hard.

    Comment by Teri — January 13, 2008 @ 4:52 pm | Reply

  38. For those of you who really feel the need to test your alcohol tolerance and have Comcast Cable TV, Saturday, A&E and Spike have all day marathons of CSI!!

    Comment by Teri — January 13, 2008 @ 4:54 pm | Reply

  39. The worst one was when Delco tracks down an e-mail over a logged IP address, which starts with no less but 350… (IPs has 4 groups of 8 bits, max number is 255).

    Excellent post, gotta try this, although this is very fast drinking.

    Comment by cicika — February 25, 2008 @ 12:27 pm | Reply

  40. LOVE IT! I watch at least 2-3 CSI’s a day (not limited to Miami.. I watch all 3.. even NY haha) and anyway… I LOVE THIS and i also love to drink so this seems like the best thing ever. Definetly make one for Vegas and NY too (although, I do agree… no one is quite as funny and easy to mock as Horatio, or “H”)
    Which should be a new rule.. anytime he’s referred to as “H” take 2 drinks

    Comment by Kat — March 9, 2008 @ 3:51 pm | Reply

  41. omg! i luv csi miami i bascialy can relate to almost every charter in every aspect! also i can somehow always figure out the crimes b4 the people on t.v do. wen i grow up n go to college i want to be just like alex n heraico. i no its going to take alot of hard work n effort n studing n listening to accomplish dat dream. n im ready to take on watever challenge to do so. n on the drinking tips im never ever going to drink ir smoke or antything like dat cuz i no wat cud happen to u. ive seen it through peoples expereinces n from some of my own family. one time wen i was lil a drunk driver in broad day light hit me while i was playing around . now i shoudnt have probabaly ben in the street playin but she shoudnt have ben speedin drunk either. expecially wen theres a sign sayin 5 for the speed limit n another sign saying children at play. but she was drunk so hher brain was lost n didnt no but i belive she may had a hangover that carried on wit her n caused some more memory laps then wat it shud have intended. but anyway i wud just like to say thanx to all the csi people for enspiring me to take on this awsome adventure in life wen i grow up.
    sicerly shay

    Comment by shay — June 3, 2008 @ 9:19 am | Reply

  42. well for all u haters my babe erick is the hottest thing in csi and well horatiop is too but thats why my babes wife died i thank that dude

    Comment by anely — July 9, 2008 @ 9:54 pm | Reply

  43. well i love csi and i think that its a good thing that we notice whats going around us i mean for all u teenagers that think non off this cant happen beleive me it can u could be in anybodys shoes right now u can be takihn drugs u can be a great ditector u can be the aoutopsy lady,,,etc…
    u guys should take life a lil more serious and stop takin things for granted well imma be a csi and the imma make sure u guys do the right thing if u guys wanna know mw more talk to me through MYSPACE.COM/PRINCESSITA_1 OR SEARCH FOR ANELY TAPIA…LOVE YA LATERS

    Comment by anely — July 9, 2008 @ 9:58 pm | Reply

  44. Hah! Love this, but there’re a few more rules I can think of.

    * Every time the results for a DNA test take longer than 30 seconds to arrive, something only done for tension purposes (“We can’t hold him any longer – we need those results to prove he was at the scene!”) – 1 drink.

    * Every time a female character uses the viewfinder on their cameras, instead of the Live View on the LCD, so you can still see their pretty faces – 2 drinks. (Note: only applicable to the later seasons, when Nikon started putting Live View on their DSlRs.)

    * Every time a MALE character uses the Live View on a camera, because the men are meant to be more professional (and older) than the female officers, and thus rock it old-school with the pentaprism, also, we don’t need to see their faces – 3 drinks.

    * Whenever Horatio unclenches his jaw when delivering a “killer” line – 6 shots of 120 proof rum.

    * Whenever Horatio finally gets sunburn, for having that pasty skin and living and working in Miami, thus, when combined with the gold filter they put over the camera, turning him the colour of a glass of fine Floridian orange juice – Take some hostages at a brewery, start drinking everything in sight and don’t stop until the police fish you from the bottom a beer storage tank.

    * Every time the two major crimes the CSI team are investigation DON’T involve a despicable person from the lower class (Cuban gangster, redneck trailer trash) as the suspect of Crime No. 1 and a snobbish, the-law-doesn’t-apply-to-me rich person (spoilt daughter of local millionaire, uppity lawyer who got rich defending Cuban gangsters) as supsect of Crime No. 2 and thus missing the opportunity to fully appeal to the middle-class demographic – get sober, join an ascetic Buddhist order and live on nothing but water for the res of your life.

    * Every time two characters engage in an “As You Know Bob” conversation (see here, part five: http://www.sfwa.org/writing/turkeycity.html) such as the following:

    “The arsonist used gasoline as an accelerant…”
    “…and, as you know, Lieutenant oil companies…”
    “…put chemical tags into their gas to identify it…”
    “…so we can find out where this gas came from! Wow, despite the fact we’re both experienced investigators and both obviously already knew this piece of information, it great that we talked it out as if to explain it to someone who was watching this…”

    – 1 sip.

    * As a related rule to Spiny’s No. 7, every time a team member extrapolates a few trivial pieces of evidence into the entire outlandish breakdown of the criminal act, and this is then rendered in a stylised, choppy, blurry flashback with heavy reverb applied to the audio.

    “Well, all we’ve got chicken blood and a torn piece of paper from a Gideon bible from the Late-Nite motel. The number is obviously part of a computer password for the financial network of a local the bank the suspect was planning on ripping off and he was writing it down on the piece of Bible paper when the manager of the motel saw him desecrating the Bible and asked him to stop, which annoyed the suspect. The argued about this, then later the conversation turned to an argument about the Dutch East India company and its affect on the history and people of Indonesia. The Manager, who was against Dutch imperialism because he was 1/10th Indonesian, then kicked the suspect out of the hotel and the suspect hit him and ran. The manager gave chase, but not before the suspect tore the number from the Bible, and they headed down 5th Street and through an alley, where the suspect ran into a chef from a Chinese restaurant that specialised in Szechuan cuisine was drinking a lukewarm bottle of lemon iced tea while smoking a menthol cigarette on his break. There was some chicken blood on the chef’s uniform, which rubbed off on the suspect. Later, when the motel manager finally caught up with the suspect, the suspect beat the manager to death with a small Fabergé egg he was carrying on him. So we’re not only looking for a potential bank robber, but a murderer as well, and if we can find this Chinese chef it’d really help out.”

    – 1 drink everytime a character does one of theses extrapolations.

    And that’s it. I apologise for the loquaciousness.

    Comment by Lithos — July 17, 2008 @ 1:11 am | Reply

  45. LMAO

    My BF and I were making up a drinking game to CSI too. We got some of yer ideas. We also made the dramatic walk off screen makes ya take a shot!

    Comment by SugarBoB — September 20, 2008 @ 3:22 am | Reply

  46. I have been a CSI fan for about 6mo. and I never cease to be amazed at this show. The most glaring inaccuracy has to be that CSI techs go on raids more than the freakin’ SWAT team. I mean if they sent lab nerds on every case and they bust thru the door before the tactical guys, they would have to be hiring all the time to replace dead lab techs.
    When H. puts his hands on his hip and and slyly pulls the coat back to expose his 10lb. badge and all the time striking the Superman pose, why I just get all choked up and a lump forms in my throat.

    Comment by 2ironboy — September 23, 2008 @ 2:07 am | Reply

  47. Here’s one for ya.

    When Caine does the sun glasses on or off with crotch pose: 1 Drink.
    When Caine does the sun glasses on or off with crotch pose and says something in mid conversation and walks off: 1 Drink.
    When Caine is in mid conversation and walks off: 1 Drink.
    When Caine does the crotch pose: 1 Drink.
    When Caine actually smiles!: 1 Drink.

    If these have already been posted and I didn’t know about it, it’s because I really couldn’t have been bothered reading all those comments. Sorry.

    (By the way, in CSI: Vegas, when Warrick is in a shot by himself you’ve gotta do a “bam-chicka-bam-wam” noise and take 1 Drink and ONLY if he’s in a shot by himself….though this would refer to the old series…:(. I miss Warrick.)

    Comment by Bree — February 15, 2009 @ 10:12 pm | Reply

  48. i love nick in csi:vegas and i love eric in csi:miami

    I LOVE NICK GOYER 4 EVA AND EVA!!!!!

    Comment by poopy — March 9, 2009 @ 2:07 pm | Reply

  49. nick goyer ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my baby boo for eva and eva

    Comment by poopy — March 9, 2009 @ 2:08 pm | Reply

  50. this is wonderful. we are drinking in Scotland right now- your game has gone global. Lots of love-Taylor, Rich and Taylor (et al.) xxxxx

    Comment by tp77 — March 13, 2009 @ 8:28 pm | Reply

  51. oh shit, I wrote Taylor twice, I meant Talia. Oops.

    Comment by tp77 — March 13, 2009 @ 8:28 pm | Reply

  52. When either female leads leaves her long hair flowing free whilst leaning over a corpse, 1 drink and shout “TIE YOUR HAIR UP!”

    When a CSI goes into a dark room and looks round using a flashlight, 1 drink and shout “TURN THE LIGHTS ON!”

    Comment by Cainehater — August 26, 2009 @ 4:59 pm | Reply

  53. Take a drink every time they say “exsanguination” instead of just saying “they bled out” in an attempt to sound scientific.

    Comment by Daniel C. — November 2, 2009 @ 8:01 pm | Reply

  54. Some more rules. These actually apply to all of the crime shows, not just the CSIs:

    1. “Fleeing the Interview” – drink every time the cops approach a suspect and he takes off running. This usually happens at least once in the midway point in a show when they feel the story starting to drag and they need to add some pointless excitement.

    2. “The Useless Lawyer” – drink every time a suspect is seen sitting at the interrogation table with his/her lawyer, with the lawyer uselessly advising the client not to say anything, and of course the client ignores the lawyer and spills everything.

    3. “We’re done here” – drink when a suspect either says “we’re done here” or asks “are we done here”? Take an extra drink if the cop says “don’t leave town”.

    Comment by Spiny Norman — November 4, 2009 @ 7:52 pm | Reply

  55. Dude me and my old roomy from a few years ago created our own version of this amazing drinking game. We had different multipliers though.

    H takes glases on or off – 1 drink
    If H says a one liner right before commercial – 1 drink
    If H says a one liner right before the end of the show – Half Beer
    H poses with hand on hip jacket flipped open – 1 drink
    H gets eye level with someone to make dramatic effect – 1 drink

    If any of these happen all within the same sequence its a multiplier. If you hit 4 in one sequence its a shot if you get some rediculous scene its a shot and a beer.

    example enemy just got shot. H poses, walks over to guy that just got shot, he takes his glasses off gets down on one knee says a one liner and its the end of the show. Ya you better be drinking a lot.

    Comment by Chris — February 14, 2010 @ 3:57 pm | Reply

  56. Do not forget the most awesome drinking reason of all: Horatio teleportation.

    Example: in the beginning of the episode where Eric and Horatio go to Brazil. Horatio confronts the bad guy on street. Bad guy says bad guy things. Car passes between them. Bad guy looks around confused, as though Horatio has vanished. Cut to Horatio kneeling before the giant Jesus statue on the hills above Rio.

    The only conclusion is teleportation. He’s done it more than once, though never as epic as that example. I suggest a full hard liquor drink followed by an immediate refill for such an occasion.

    Comment by Aimee — March 3, 2010 @ 1:25 pm | Reply

  57. These are the rules that me and my friends play by:

    -Take a drink every time Horatio says one of his one liners
    -Take a drink every time Horatio is talking to someone but still looking down at the ground or not at them at all
    -Take a drink every time there is a short montage of the CSI team doing scientific things to get a DNA or test result back
    -Take a drink every time there is a direct shot of alex’s ass
    -Take a drink every time you see the Miami Shoreline
    -Take a drink every time you see actually see the words “Miami Dade Police” spelled out somewhere
    -Take a drink every time you see a dead body
    -Take a drink every time you see a murder
    -Take a drink every time you see a picture of a dead person
    -Take a drink every time you see a dead person
    -Take a drink every time a CSI member has ridiculous knowledge of something unrelated to the police profession that helps with the case
    -Take a drink every time there is a flashback to the murder or just a flashback to something in general
    -Take a drink every time there is an interrogation
    -Take a drink every time Frank puts his hand on his hip, pulling back his suit, and exposing his gut
    -Take a drink every time they use computers and programs to an unrealistic extent
    -Take a drink every time they zoom into a body to show the effects of drugs or physical damage
    -Take a drink every time there is flirting going on between members of the CSI team

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